‘Flat Earth Society’ Expedition to Photograph the Edge of the Earth Mysteriously Vanishes

Hong Kong:

In a prepared statement, Flat Earth Society President Daniel Shenton announced that the search for missing expedition vessel Plane Traveler has been concluded, and he considered the high-tech vessel to be officially ‘Lost off the Edge of the Earth’.

The vessel was last seen at a final fund-raising stop in Pearl Harbor, Honolulu last month before embarking on it’s journey. The result of a wildly successful GoFundMe campaign last year, which raised 4.3 million dollars for the epic journey, the vessel was constructed secretly at a still undisclosed location in record time, and was said to have ‘The best in maritime technology. The very best. You would not believe the science we have on board this boat!‘ according to statements from Mr. Shenton at the time.

The expedition was expected to take six months, as various ‘Key Edge Points’ central to the Flat Earth theory, were to be visited and studied. The crew roster has always been a closely guarded secret, to avoid ‘Blackmail and coercion¬† attempts,’ according to Mr. Shenton.

Some have expressed skepticism about the expedition on several key points. It’s been suggested that a vessel of this size could not have been completed in the time frame claimed, and others have remarked on the similarity to a standard design for small freighters common to the 1970’s.

Mr. Shenton also denied as ‘pure drivel’ any connection to recent reports and photos of a strikingly similar vessel allegedly operating as an illegal floating casino off the coast of Molokai, which began appearing roughly two weeks after Plane Traveler last left port.

 

 

 

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Noted science aficionado and conspiracy theorist John 'Tinfoil' Acheson currently helms our Science Desk. John works tirelessly to bring you the latest wonders from the cutting-edge world of science and technology, WHO is really responsible, and WHY.