iWish: Apple’s Mysterious New Device Slated to be Available for Xmas

apple-i-wishCupertino, CA:

Almost lost in the hype and noise of its new iPhone rollout, Apple (NASDAQ: AAPL) also quietly released scant details on a ‘revolutionary’ new product due to be on retail shelves in time for late Christmas shoppers, the iWish.

In a press release dated today, Apple called the device a ‘miraculous paradigm shift in the evolution of product marketing’ and predicted ‘Every cool home will have one by this time next year’. Other details such as pricing, and what the heck it actually does, were absent from the release.

Insider sources claiming to have seen product prototypes say the device is a small glowing orb, seemingly defying gravity by floating a few inches above whatever surface it’s placed on. It also appears to holographically project the Apple logo several inches in front of its surface, which has prompted some to postulate that it is a new form of media and entertainment device.

Our own Flying Car News Team contacted Apple’s Marketing and Incursion Department by phone this afternoon, in order to gather more details about the mysterious new device. The representative flatly told us, “If you really have to ask, you’re just not cool enough to know” and promptly hung up.

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Noted science aficionado and conspiracy theorist John ‘Tinfoil’ Acheson currently helms our Science Desk. John works tirelessly to bring you the latest wonders from the cutting-edge world of science and technology, WHO is really responsible, and WHY.